On Starting Over and Recreating

On starting over with blogging

I was twelve when I decided to keep an online journal and started blogging. Exploring various free blogging platforms such as Tumblr, Livejournal and Blogger, I went by the usernames Chelseyunplugged, Chinkydaydreamer, and Chelsaurus (I know, I cringe every time I remember the cheesy usernames I used to come up with). Anyway, a couple of years later, every single blog has been forgotten and/or deleted.

I began to fall in love with places right before I finished college. That’s when I discovered my love for exploration and documenting memories. Since then, I decided to set foot in as many places as I can while capturing moments along the way. Throughout the years, I have been collecting photos; keeping them in my hard drive and posting some on my Instagram—telling myself that I will keep things that way until I am finally ready to take on the challenge of putting up a blog again. My photos grew larger in number each month until I finally decided it was time to work on the project I had been planning out since I started traveling around. And so, Chasing Chelsey was born.
My blog contains musings and explorations. In here, I share stories of my personal encounters and experiences, not guides. Although, I hope that you find my posts helpful in travel planning. I refuse o write detailed guides and itineraries for I believe choosing the places to visit while traveling should depend on the person’s personal preferences and character. Setting a strict itinerary can put too much pressure and can somehow affect the mood of the journey. That is why I want to encourage my readers (if there are any) to embark on your own personal journey which will help you find inner peace and fulfillment.
In this blog I call my home, I share all sorts of creative content that I can come up with. Although, I am still in the process of learning new things and experimenting with my creativity. I always strive to create something beautiful and inspirational out of my memory collection and life experiences. Basically, this is the haven of my thoughts. This space is a collection of stories, art experiments, and a whole bunch of photos from my random explorations.
One of the challenges that I had to face while starting over was demotivation. I was afraid that I might produce nothing remarkable. I feared my readers’ reaction. I was afraid that they might find my content mediocre–that I produce half-baked content. I was worried that no one would show interest in what I create and put out for the world to see. I had to constantly remind myself that I am doing this for myself, not for anyone else. I write for myself, I create for myself. The most important thing that I had to realize was that I had to accept myself first in order for others to love what I do.
I remember stumbling upon Direk Tonet Jadaone’s post entitled Anak, kung sakaling gusto mong maging direktor balang araw in her blog. It’s an ode to her ‘child’ that it tackles the hardships of being a filmmaker. She started off by telling her ‘child’ not make a film if he/she isn’t prepared to be exhausted, broke, and demotivated. I was crying upon finishing the poem which ended with the following lines:

Pero anak, kung sakaling gusto mo talagang maging direktor balang araw
ngunit wala kang pera, wala kang ipon,
at nababaliw at naluluha ka ng alas-dos ng umaga,
kung sakaling gusto mo talagang maging direktor balang araw
ngunit tingin mo’y hindi ka handa,
o walang sapat na mga taong nagtitiwala,

Gumawa ka pa rin ng pelikula,

dahil iyan palang pagnanais mong gumawa ng pelikula, anak,
sa palagay ko,
sapat na.

It is such a beautiful piece. I could not help but reflect on why I should keep going, why I should always create, why I should not stop being passionate in what I do, and why I should not lose hope. From time to time, I am tempted to file that resignation letter and chase my passions, but I am always blocked by the thought that I need the monthly salary to fund my travels. What if I fail? What if I don’t succeed? Some people might not understand why I prefer to leave my day job (that pays well) to be in pursuit of my creative journey, but one day, they will. I have my own vision and dreams and I will do everything to pursue my them. I can and I will find my place in the world while living my purpose. Someday, I will be able to tell myself in fulfilment, “This is it. This is the dream. This is the life.”

SJSR-144

On recreating my Instagram

Before I decided to move into a new Instagram account, I was considering a lot of things. I thought of the followers I have gained since I first created the account in 2010 as well as the likes for each photo. Not to mention the fact that it was my very first Instagram account. I was afraid to start over. @chelsagco used to be my spare account. I created it with the intention of saving the username. I kept the account private for two years before finally deciding to migrate every post from @chelseyagcopra. I actually thought of keeping it private until I finish posting everything to avoid spamming my followers’ timeline.

You see, I tend to get really timid and I care too much about what other people think. I used to give a f*ck about how people might react to my posts and how much I upload. Until I decided to do it anyway. I just went for it. The hell with my former account’s 500+ followers, half of them are already inactive anyway. I realized I really don’t care about the numbers after all.

I was really hesitant at first. I even avoided putting lengthy captions to make my posts less annoying. But then, I started receiving positive feedback and kind words and it encouraged me to keep going (I also gained self-esteem). So, I would like to thank my followers for appreciating what I do. After all, it is MY account. Why do I have to care about what others think about it? And so I kept going—I filled my feed with wonderful memories as much as I could. I also realized how much I enjoy sharing stories through my captions. That’s why I do it every once in a while.

Throughout the past three years, I have accumulated a growing collection of photos from my travels. Some of which were posted on @chelseyagcopra but 80% did not make it and were stuck in my hard drive. That explains why I post almost every day—I have been trying to share all my favorite memories with the world. (also, for documentation and safekeeping purposes)

And so, I’m down to the last few sets of photos and in less than a month, I guess everything will be back to normal. I will still post regularly but not as much as I have been doing in the past few months. I am still hoping my followers are not getting annoyed with all the flooding and crappy iphoneography. I try as much as I can to post visually pleasing photos to make everything tolerable. I do hope, in a way, my followers enjoy seeing my posts as much as I enjoyed curating them. To my ever understanding and appreciative followers, thank you for putting up with me. Really.

SJSR-149

Anyway, I am fueled with inspiration lately. All thanks to my sources of inspiration (the people I admire in the creative and media industry, my loved ones, my followers who never fail to motivate me).  This is my very same goal: to inspire others to do and create things that truly make them happy. Life is too short to hesitate and hold back. Let’s gather up our courage and chase our dreams, anyway! Attend that art class, hike that mountain, book that trip! If it makes you happy, it will always be worth it. Here’s to helping each other grow and mature creatively. Let’s keep inspiring each other! ❤️

 

One thought on “On Starting Over and Recreating

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s